Widows, Leadership and Marriage

Dear Jaduong Obat,

What moving lines of verse about the lives of widows. How Times have changed: The idea of widows marrying within the clan of their diseased was meant to protect the widow and the commonwealth (children) of her diseased husband (even those born to the caretaker husbands still shared in the commonwealth of the man). The widow and her children were assured of ancestral land among their kin. But this safety net has turned into a nightmare for the modern widow because a breakdown in moral order and a lack of a just and sound leadership.

What We must mourn is the collapse of a just Luo clan leadership (what we have today are a corrupt group of Jondongaich. Other Elders, like the writer are dislocated in the wider Diaspora and therefore unavailable to lead). In such an uncertain and chaotic situation, the tendency of the overwhelmed modern Woman is to marry a Jakowiny (alien). The clan in a backlash then goes for their diseased son's land. But the children have the right to fight for a share in the land; at any point in time. Nobody will deny them the land unless their mother is weak. These laws have not changed. What the woman cannot be allowed to do is sell her young children's ancestral land (in the name of holding a Title) then elope with a Jakowiny in Nairobi. Any clan will not allow such a shortsighted misuse of a title deed. Remember, uncestral land belongs to a clan.

I am NOT a supporter of forced widow inheritance within a clan (Read my book: SUNSET ON POLYGAMY, ISBN 1-4241-6684-5), but remarrying within a clan (if possible) is the best of situations---- it means continuity, identity and a closer kinship oversight for the children. Over the centuries, it has kept the cultural identity of the Ramogi people fairly intact. Therefore, no woman should encourage her children into an uncalled for battles with their uncles, cousins and grandparents.

Today's Marriage or Remarriage by any man or woman must consider the reality of AIDS (AYAKI). Beyond that, the woman must give her children that sense of being of part of some clan. That is what keeps the Indians, Irish, Italians, and my Luo people ticking. Each ethnicity, wherever they are in the world are proud to declare that they belong to some Shantilil, McBride, Battelli, Bwayi, or Konyango clan.

In the spirit of Our shared Journey

Joseph Ramogi Alila
(Author: 1. The Milayi Curse, ISBN 978-1-4303-2441-6.
2. The Wise One of Ramogiland, ISBN 978-1-4303-2554-3)

http://www.jaramogialila.blogspot.com